Daily Reflection

APRIL 16
ANGER: A "DUBIOUS LUXURY"
If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch
and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be the
dubious luxury of the normal men, but for alcoholics these
things are poison.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 66
"Dubious luxury." How often have I remembered those
words. It's not just anger that's best left to nonalcoholics; I
built a list including justifiable resentment, self-pity,
judgmentalism, self-righteousness, false pride and false
humility. I'm always surprised to read the actual quote. So
well have the principles of the program been drummed into
me that I keep thinking all of these defects are listed too.
Thank God I can't afford them—or I surely would indulge
in them.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 15
THE BONDAGE OF RESENTMENTS
. . . harboring resentment is infinitely grave. For then we
shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the spirit.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 5
It has been said, "Anger is a luxury I cannot afford." Does
this suggest I ignore this human emotion? I believe not.
Before I learned of the A.A. program, I was a slave to the
behavior patterns of alcoholism. I was chained to
negativity, with no hope of cutting loose.
The Steps offered me an alternative. Step Four was the
beginning of the end of my bondage. The process of
"letting go" started with an inventory. I needed not be
frightened, for the previous Steps assured me I was not
alone. My Higher Power led me to this door and gave me
the gift of choice. Today I can choose to open the door to
freedom and rejoice in the sunlight of the Steps, as they
cleanse the spirit within me.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 14
THE "NUMBER ONE OFFENDER"
Resentment is the "number one" offender. It destroys more
alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of
spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and
physically ill, we have been spiritually sick.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 64
As I look at myself practicing the Fourth Step, it is easy to
gloss over the wrong that I have done, because I can easily
see it as a question of "getting even" for a wrong done to
me. If I continue to relive my old hurt, it is a resentment
and resentment bars the sunlight from my soul. If I
continue o relive hurts and hates, I will hurt and hate
myself. After years in the dark of resentments, I have bund
the sunlight. I must let go of resentments; I cannot afford
them.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 13
THE FALSE COMFORT OF SELF-PITY
Self-pity is one of the most unhappy and consuming defects
that we know. It is a bar to all spiritual progress and can
cut off all effective communication with our fellows because
of its inordinate demands for attention and sympathy. It is a
maudlin form of martyrdom, which we can ill afford.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 238
The false comfort of self-pity screens me from reality only
momentarily and then demands, like a drug, that I take an
ever bigger dose. If I succumb to this it could lead to a
relapse into drinking. What can I do? One certain antidote is
to turn my attention, however slightly at first, toward others
who are genuinely less fortunate than I, preferably other
alcoholics. In the same degree that I actively demonstrate
my empathy with them, I will lessen my own exaggerated
suffering.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 12
GIVING UP INSANITY
. . . where alcohol has been involved, we have been
strangely insane.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 38
Alcoholism required me to drink, whether I wanted to or
not. Insanity dominated my life and was the essence of my
disease. It robbed me of the freedom of choice over
drinking and, therefore, robbed me of all other choices.
When I drank, I was unable to make effective choices in
any part of my life and life became unmanageable.
I ask God to help me understand and accept the full
meaning of the disease of alcoholism.

Changes

Folks It saddens me that I might have to shut this blog down in the future, The doctors have diagnosed me with cancer and I already have a hospice nurse stopping  by 2-3 times a week. I'm searching for someone to commit themselves to taking over. You might have to change the web address, but the daily reflection should always be there. Peace Out Sivle

Daily Reflection

APRIL 11
A WORD TO DROP: "BLAME"
To see how erratic emotions victimized us often took a long
time. We could perceive them quickly in others, but only
slowly in ourselves First of all, we had to admit that we had
many of these defects, even though such disclosures were
painful and humiliating. Where other people were
concerned, we had to drop the word "blame" from our
speech and thought
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 47
When I did my Fourth Step, following the Big Book
guidelines, I noticed that my grudge list was filled with my
prejudices and my blaming others for my not being able to
succeed and to live up to my potential. I also discovered I
felt different because I was black. As I continued to work
on the Step, I learned that I always had drunk to rid myself
of those feelings. It was only when I sobered up and
worked on my inventory, that I could no longer blame
anyone.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 10
GROWING UP
The essence of all growth is a willingness to change for the
better and then an unremitting willingness to shoulder
whatever responsibility this entails.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 115
Sometimes when I've become willing to do what I should
have been doing all along, I want praise and recognition. I
don't realize that the more I'm willing to act differently, the
more exciting my life is. The more I am willing to help
others, the more rewards I receive. That's what practicing
the principles means to me. Fun and benefits for me are in
the willingness to do the actions, not to get immediate
results. Being a little kinder, a little slower to anger, a little
more loving makes my life better— day by day.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 9
FREEDOM FROM "KING ALCOHOL"
. . . let us not suppose even for an instant that we are not
under constraint. . . . Our former tyrant, King Alcohol,
always stands ready again to clutch us to him Therefore,
freedom from alcohol is the great "must" that has to be
achieved, else we go mad or die.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 134
When drinking, I lived in spiritual, emotional, and
sometimes, physical confinement. I had constructed my
prison with bars of self-will and self-indulgence, from
which I could not escape. Occasional dry spells that
seemed to promise freedom would turn out to be little more
than hopes of a reprieve. True escape required a
willingness to follow whatever right actions were needed to
turn the lock. With that willingness and action, both the
lock and the bars themselves opened for me. Continued
willingness and action keep me free—in a kind of extended
daily probation—that need never end.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 8
AN INSIDE LOOK
We want to find exactly how, when, and where our natural
desires have warped us We wish to look squarely at the
unhappiness this has caused others and ourselves By
discovering what our emotional deformities are, we can
move toward their correction.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 43
Today I am no longer a slave to alcohol, yet in so many
ways enslavement still threatens—my self, my desires,
even my dreams. Yet without dreams I cannot exist;
without dreams there is nothing to keep me moving
forward.
I must look inside myself, to free myself. I must call
upon God's power to face the person I've feared the most,
the true me, the person God created me to be. Unless I can
or until I do, I will always be running, and never be truly
free. I ask God daily to show me such a freedom!

Daily Reflection

APRIL 7
A WIDE ARC OF GRATITUDE
And, speaking for Dr. Bob and myself, I gratefully declare
that had it not been for our wives, Anne and Lois, neither of
us could have lived to see A.A.'s beginning.
THE A.A. WAY OF LIFE, p. 67
Am I capable of such generous tribute and gratitude to my
wife, parents and friends, without whose support I might
never have survived to reach A.A.'s doors? I will work on
this and try to see the plan my Higher Power is showing me
which links our lives together.

Daily Reflection

APRIL 6
A LIFETIME PROCESS
We were having trouble with personal relationships, we
couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to
misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a
feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were
unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other
people. . . .
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 52
These words remind me that I have more problems than
alcohol, that alcohol is only a symptom of a more pervasive
disease. When I stopped drinking I began a lifetime process
of recovery from unruly emotions, painful relationships, and
unmanageable situations. This process is too much for most
of us without help from a Higher Power and our friends in
the Fellowship. When I began working the Steps of the A.A.
program, many of these tangled threads unraveled but, little
by little, the most broken places of my life straightened out.
One day at a time, almost imperceptibly, I healed. Like a
thermostat being turned down, my fears diminished. I began
to experience moments of contentment. My emotions
became less volatile. I am now once again a part of the
human family.